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presenting a case without believing it himself. That showed his weakness as a
leader. Failing to get what he had
been sent to get would make him seem weak in the eyes of some children Ariel
in particular.
But he did not care what she thought.
What would Theresa think? And William?
What would Rosa Sequoia think? Rosa, who needed a strong leader to draw her
back into the group?
Sitting on the edge of a table, Martin finished his crew report, the most
difficult few minutes in recent memory. Most of the children seventy-two of
them sat in the main cafeteria, the only space besides the schoolroom large
enough to hold them all at once.
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The ship's deceleration had hastened and they now faced a steady two g's. They
were tired and they listened to his report quietly.
"That's it," he concluded, looking from face to face to keep direct visual
contact with as many as he could. Then he gave that up; it might make him seem
nervous. Instead, he focused on four or five in the front ranks.
Hans Eagle and Erin Eire sat in the front row. Hans' expression was quizzical.
Erin cradled her cat, a fat gray thing with exhausted, bored eyes and matted
fur.
"Did you argue with them?" someone asked from the middle. Martin looked up
quickly and tried to spot the face, but answered before he had identified
Terence Sahara.
"I did my best to present our case," he said. "Either we believe them, or we
don't. And if we don't believe them& " He let the question hang.
Theresa sat on a bench to his right. He glanced at her; she smiled support.
William, on the opposite side, about one third back into the crowd, sat with
hands behind his head, elbows like stubby wings, eyes closed.
No one stood against the oppressive force; no one exerted themselves more than
they absolutely had to.
"It's frightening," Erin Eire said. She swallowed; even speaking seemed
tiring. "We thought they were all-wise, all-knowing. If the Ship of the Law
doesn't know, then the machines that saved us probably didn't know, either&
don't know."
"What the Benefactors know? Anything?" Jack Sand asked.
do
Felicity Tigertail, in the front row Martin's first lover, back on the Central
Ark, during a brief two-day tryst raised her hand as if she were in school.
Martin nodded to her. Her arm was bruised, he noted; they all had bruises from
such casual actions as letting arms drop. She lowered her arm cautiously.
"We're lost if we don't believe them," she said. "We have to believe them.
That should be obvious."
"We don't have to believe anything," Ariel said from the rear, voice loud to
rise above the murmuring. She sounded harsh, angry. Martin wondered where she
got her energy to stay angry.
"We have to ask questions. We should continue to ask questions! I think this
is bullshit. They can defend themselves against the kind of machines that
destroyed Earth! Why worry about what information they carry? The moms the
Benefactors are simply afraid of . They don't want us us to know anything
about them or their makers. "
Martin started to speak, but Paola Birdsong, in the middle of the group,
shouted out first, "Hold it! Does anybody here have enough imagination to see
what the moms are really saying?
Martin, do you know what they're telling us?"
"They're not all-powerful," Jack Sand said.
"I'm asking Martin!" Paola insisted.
Martin looked out over the group from his seat on the table top, then with
great effort stood up, holding his hands behind his back. The table seemed
very high. If he fell, he could break a leg. Or his neck. "They seem to say
there are hunter-killers out there from civilizations much more
technologically advanced than the one or ones that built the Ships of the Law.
"
"It never ends! Nobody ever learns!" Erin Eire cried out. Her cat tried to
crawl away in distaste. "Nobody ever grows old enough to be kind or wise!"
"Hold it," Martin said, raising his hand. Noise rippled through the children,
words of shock and dismay. "Hold it! Quiet!" he shouted hoarsely.
"Quiet!" Hans repeated, his voice like a bear's growl in the cafeteria space.
The children quieted. Ariel stood and lumbered from the room, followed by two
others whose faces Martin didn't catch in the rear gloom.
"To get agreement to build these machines, the Benefactors have to guarantee
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security. Safety.
They need to know that sending the ships and machines out won't backfire and
lead bigger wolves down on them. That's just caution. Maybe there aren't
really any bigger wolves out there.
But they have to be cautious. And of course, in time, maybe we will become
dangerous, like a lion turning on its keeper." He looked at Felicity and
smiled. Felicity nodded.
"We shouldn't be cynical," Martin said. "The moms tell us we're good, and that
we have what we need. We just have to work extra hard with what we have. We
have to drill. We have to make up our own exercises based on what we've
already been taught. They took risks by teaching us what they have. We're
powerful, given the weapons we're taught to use. That shows some kind of
trust, doesn't it?" [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]